The Recipe For A “Better Apart” Divorce

I wrote Better Apart with the hope of powerfully transforming the conversation around divorce.

I wanted to be a force in releasing the shame and stigma associated with breaking up and empowering people to feel good about their lives and about themselves even when their relationship has broken down. Better Apart and the transformative possibilities it holds for your divorce journey.

If you’ve yet to read Better Apart; The Radically Positive Way to Separate, you can grab your copy here. To get you started in understanding what a Better Apart divorce is, I thought today we would dive deeper into the five key elements that will empower you to become Better Apart, putting you in control of your own path towards a positive outcome through and beyond your divorce process.

1. Practice Patience:

Patience is a powerful tool that allows you to approach your divorce process with a calm and focused mindset. By creating space before reacting, taking a deep breath, and responding thoughtfully instead of impulsively, you can transform reactivity into measured responsiveness. Remember, the power lies within you to choose how you navigate the challenges that arise.

2. Activate Self-Respect:

Recognize that your sense of self-respect plays a crucial role in shaping your divorce experience. By setting stronger boundaries and focusing on activities and people that bring you joy, you elevate your own well-being. Choose to show up as your best self, even in challenging interactions with your ex, and observe how it creates positive shifts in your communication dynamics. Remember, you have agency over your own words and actions, and by acting with kindness and respect, you prioritize yourself and foster a healthier environment.

3. Give Yourself the Gift of Peace:

Peace may not mean rainbows and unicorns, but it can be achieved by reaching a state of neutrality where things are no longer defined as good or bad. Embrace the power of positive statements and affirmations to cultivate a sense of contentment and acknowledge the good-enough moments. As you gain clarity on the aspects of your life you wish to change, use this newfound clarity as a guide during interactions with your ex. Engage with your inner visionary and manifest your deepest desires, even as you navigate the challenges of divorce.

4. Create Clarity:

Focus on creating clarity in your divorce process by shifting your attention away from blame and past conflicts. Your life is not solely defined by your ex or the games of fault-finding. Embrace the power of becoming an active visionary in your own life. By clarifying your desires, making lists, and manifesting your intentions, you take charge of your decisions regarding finances, parenting, and other important aspects of your future. Remember, the clarity you seek resides within you, waiting to be harnessed.

5. Begin to Forgive or Accept:

Forgiveness and acceptance are key elements that unlock emotional freedom and allow you to move forward. Understand that forgiveness is a gift you give yourself, releasing the burden of anger and resentment. Acceptance, too, plays a significant role in your journey, as it enables you to acknowledge the imperfections of others and yourself, recognizing our shared humanity. By embracing forgiveness and acceptance as regular practices, you expand your capacity for compassion and experience true emotional liberation.

It’s important to remember that the power to become Better Apart lies within you. You have the ability to shape your divorce experience, redefine your relationships, and create a positive future for yourself. Through the Better Apart principles and strategies, you can pave the way towards a peaceful resolution and a fulfilling life beyond divorce.

Your divorce can be a truly transformative process. You can take these five elements and implement them into your divorce process and beyond, helping you embrace the power of becoming Better Apart.

Until then, if you have any questions or wish to discuss your unique situation, please don’t hesitate to reach out.